Not too much to say lately.  I made a "calling card' for the mom's group.  I've been running around trying to get the house in order for the impending visit from Nancy.  I really don't like her, and I don't like what she does to Lucy and Tom when she comes here.  

I did have a bit of a revelation yesterday, though.  I was telling Mike about all the things I was trying to do to get the house ready for the cookout and I said that it was really important to his mom that we "impress" her.  He said that he was confused because she has been just getting on my nerves recently and why would I go out of my way for her?.  And it hit me that this is the first time I've ever really understood the concept of family.  Even though Lucy drives me crazy sometimes (and I'm sure I drive her crazy too) I'd still do anything for her in a heartbeat and I think she'd do anything for me.  Isn't it weird that I've learned this through Mike's family, but I really don't feel that way about anyone in mine?  Maybe because I've never really felt that they'd be there for me - probably because no one ever was unless it was convenient.  For all my dad says, I honestly believe that he should have taken me from Barb.  If she wanted to take him to court he should have let her.  Deep down, he was probably a little relieved to be able to live his life the way he wanted and have a break from dealing with a child.  Same as my mom when they divorced, just not quite as honest about it as she was.  And Barb only wanted me to preserve her youth, but whatever.  My point is that Mike's family has given me a real feel for what a family should be.  That's the life I want for Spencer.

I told Dennis today that I won't be returning for next year.  He said to submit a letter to human resources and we'd take it from there.  He did lay the groundwork for the board not approving and extended leave.  When he asked what I'd do if that happened, I just kinda tap danced, but I said I'd probably be forced to resign.  I'm really going to miss the people there.  KE was telling a story about a kid who was bragging that he was going to drink and drive even as he was returning from the mock crash and motivational speaker.  I think that was an appropriate final story.  Keeps in perspective what I'm leaving behind and keeps the nostalgia to a minimum.