Yesterday at Melanie's we had a yummy lunch and then went out to the pool. It is one of those soft side deal-o's so I wasn't sure how I'd deal with two kids. Spencer stayed in the baby float for a few minutes until he warmed up to the water. Then he wanted to be totally in the water and shortly after realized that he could touch the bottom and walk. Rachel didn't like the float at first, but also warmed up to it after a few minutes. She eventually really enjoyed it. I dunked Spencer so that he would know what it felt like to be completely under water, but he still got really scared when he went under by accident a few minutes later. He wanted out to the pool. I tried to keep him in a few minutes longer, but he persisted so I let him out. He played in the yard for awhile and then wanted back in the pool right about the time I was getting out. Rachel really enjoyed floating around in her little raft. She was super cute.
Spencer did go down a big slide at the park today. He's been a bit apprehensive since he went down one sideways about a month ago. Last week, I finally sat down with him and forced him to go down a big slide again on my lap. He fought me at first and we left right afterwards. I wasn't sure if I'd done the right thing until I saw him go down a big one without hesitation today. That's also why I kept him in the water for a few minutes after he dunked yesterday. I was worried he wouldn't want to go back in. I was wrong though, because he was ready to go back in after a few minute break. I think he just needed to take a break.
Rachel said 'hi' to someone else today. A total stranger. That was cool. She hasn't seemed to be able to get the word out unless she is totally relaxed, which she is generally not around strangers. The other woman had a baby about her age, so maybe that made a difference. She has been in a generally good mood today, come to think of it. None of the constant whining that has become typical in the last week.
Not really looking forward to the weekend. I don't want to argue with Mike, but it seems lately that we spend all weekend doing just that. It already started last night, because I was trying to explain something to him and of course, he took it as an insult and started feeling sorry for himself. He left this morning after commenting that he would spend the entire evening with the kids and then do all the house cleaning after they go to bed and I shouldn't do anything all day. He had said during therapy last week that he doesn't like my assumption that whenever he mentions taking a vacation or some sort of relaxation he always means without the kids. The fact that my assumption has always been correct is immaterial. So last night, he came home and the house was, admittedly, a mess. It's usually pretty picked up, but yesterday was an exception and it was bad. I didn't have dinner ready or planned. I had lost track of time playing outside in the water wiht the kids. So he spent the entire evening doing dishes, picking up, mopping the floor (although I had done that earlier in the day already). All of this time I was playing with Spencer and getting Rachel down to sleep. He did take Rachel into her room to get her ready for bed, but he was getting frustrated and short with her, so I took over. So at the end of the evening, he came in as I was reading to Spencer and his body language was very clear that he was tired and wanted Spencer in bed so he could chill. I told him that I had Spencer the rest of the night and he could go do whatever. I went on to say that this was exactly what I meant. He's in a hurry to get 'everything' done (house picked up, coffeepot set, dishwasher timer on, dogs fed, etc) so that at 7 Spencer will be put to bed and Mike is 'off' so to speak. He spent zero time with the kids other than at the dinner table, and then he was telling them to be quiet so he could talk to me. He just wants to make it to 7 everynight so that he can play one game or another. So he comes back with when should it be done, and I said, after the kids go to bed? He gets sooooooooo annoyed at me (and I get uber pissed in return) when he wants to play WoW with me and I have things to do still after Spencer goes to bed. Things like finish picking up the house, dealing with bills, posting on message boards, etc. Things that he would do while the kids are awake so that he doesn't have to waste precious non-kid time with it. But I'm a bitch for assuming that his idea of fun/relaxation involves someone else taking care of the kids. And he also took a pot shot at saying that if the house wasnt' a mess, he wouldn't have to pick up. Low blow. I just said that I know, and that's why I hired the cleaning service because on the best days, I can barely get caught up, much less ever ahead on cleaning. He said that he got me caught up - HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! - his idea of caught up and mine are very, very different, but I've know that for a long time, so I just said thanks. So anyway, I not looking forward to his arrival home. I haven't done anything different today than I normally would and I'm trying not to assume that he's going to act one way or another. I'd like to not argue. You know, I think that if he wants to make good on his spend the entire evening with the kids and then clean up the house when they go to bed, maybe I'll let him. Fuck him. If he wants to feel sorry for himself and throw a "I have to do everything" pity party without actually thinking about how little he really does do, then I'll let him. I'm not going to get sucked into his negativity, I'll take advantage of it ;o).