Feeling better today. Mike seems to have turned a corner. Even bought me flowers today for V-Day. Totally unexpected and really nice. My favorite too - daisies. I hope this is a lasting thing and not just a phase in the cycle. Or at the very least I hope the cycle doesn’t hit rock bottom again anytime soon. He made a comment about his own unpredictability, so maybe he has been thinking about what I said last week. It’s been really nice to have two days in a row without the tension that’s been present for so long now. He didn’t sleep at all last night, I hope he can get some sleep tonight.

Doodle is doing well. Rachel is doing well. I felt that heart- swelling love feeling for her today for the first time while she was doing back flips in there. I don’t remember feeling that for Doodle until after he was born. Been working on Rachel’s laundry. I wanted to wait until we had the furniture so I could put it all away, but I couldn’t ;). After that swell of feeling today I felt like I need to have everything ready ASAP, so that we are ready for her at any time and she knows we are excited for her to be here. Ridiculous, I know...

I’m starting to get really tired again. Not as bad, but it’s just starting, so I think it’s going to get worse. Almost had morning sickness, but I was able to hold it off with half a dozen Tums. I’m going to try really hard to nap during Spencer’s afternoon nap. I always intend to, but I end up picking up the house or settling for "relaxing" in the chair which just never gives me the rest I need. So today I napped. Only got about 20 minutes by the time doodle went to sleep, then I got to sleep, then he woke up again. Hopefully, I’ll be able to get to sleep faster with some practice. And Mike pointed out that it will help me prepare for napping when Rachel arrives. I couldn’t really nap after Spencer was born, I just couldn’t seem to let myself relax enough to fall asleep without being so exhausted that I was at the point of passing out. Hopefully, I’ll be calmer this time, and PPD won’t be so all-consuming and uncontrollable. I think we are all hoping for that...